A View of Santhigiri Ashram

A View of Santhigiri Ashram
Lotus Parnasala and Sahakarana Mandiram , Santhigiri Ashram, Thiruvananthapuram, Kerala

Thursday, August 27, 2015

The Importance of Spiritual Guidance before Marriage

Birth, marriage and death are the most important events in the life-cycle of man. One of the important duties of a householder is to give birth to a good offspring through married life. Ironically, we can see around us many children or youth who are physically handicapped, mentally retarded or with criminal tendencies, psychological problems, drug addiction etc. According to medical science, such handicaps are due to genetic factors.  However, medical science has no solution to prevent such congenital handicaps. On a deep analysis, we can see that genetic problems are the result of a distorted life. Genetic problems, as we know, are related to the lives of our ancestors. The Indian sages called these genetic problems as pitru dosha, i.e. the demerit of ancestral souls. If we term genetic problem as pitru dosha in the native tongue, our secular intelligentsia would pounce upon us saying that all this is superstition.The physical and psychological traits of parents are transferred to the children. Every human cell or DNA is the aggregate of human experiences, values, thoughts and actions of an individual carried through a long chain of existence. According to Navajyotisree Karunakara Guru, pitru dosha is the result of wrong values, thoughts and actions in the life of our ancestors, which influence the life and destiny of offspring. Therefore, it becomes necessary to be aware of the ancestral influences with which our souls and families are affected. As we know, it cannot be known through laboratory methods, but only through the special faculty of supramental vision of a realized seer. Here lies the need for a source of authentic spiritual guidance to know about the unknown factors that affect our life and destiny. 

Next, let us take up the issue of marriage. Marriage, as well all know, is for the purpose of begetting progeny, for the continuity of family lineage. Nowadays, we see that there is lot of disharmony in our homes, between husband and wife and between parents and children. Many marriages break down with its unpleasant consequences because these marriages take place driven by blind emotions. There is a general ignorance about the sacred institution of marriage and family. Normally, parents marry off their children viewing only the material aspects of the bride and bridegroom such as physical attraction, education, wealth, family status, etc. However, the soul harmony of the couple, the spiritual status of ancestral souls, the background of family worship tradition, etc. are not considered.  

A soul which is not spiritually awakened could be a hindrance to a spiritually developed soul. Some souls may be spiritually aligned in a different way that would not be in harmony with the spiritual inclination of the other. For example, the husband may be following a particular tradition, while the wife would be deeply devoted to some other sect or way of worship. Such spiritual mismatch of couples would lead to disharmony and lack of peace in married life. 

Secondly, the parental and ancestral background of the couple should be spiritually evaluated before marriage. Ancestors with a wicked karmic background may cause the birth of undesired progeny with similar wicked tendencies. The spiritual distortions and karmic faults of ancestors might lead to the birth of children with genetic disabilities. Therefore, a girl or boy should marry considering the similarity of their ancestral background. However, caste background, physical beauty, social status and wealth need not be seen for such a spiritual evaluation. 

Thirdly, the spiritual as well as karmic background of the couples should be compatible. The baggage of good and bad karma and the amount of virtue or vice (punya and papa) in the soul decides the success or failure of any individual in life. For a successful marriage, the punya of both the souls should be in equilibrium. A boy with a tendency to steal can be married to a girl with similar tendency; otherwise, it would cause undesired problem in married life. The disharmony and severe problems faced by families today are due to the ignorance about these factors and lack of spiritual guidance. Some Hindu families approach astrologers to know about the suitability of marriage. However, astrological consultation may not always give you the complete truth. Therefore, it is imperative that we seek the guidance of an all-knowing Guru and understand the sacred institution of family and marriage in its spiritual perspective so that we would be better placed to fulfill dharma, artha, kama and moksha - the value system guiding our social life.
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